Papa (Grandpa) Tommy Lee Hallman went home to the Lord on Saturday, June 6, 2009 at 4:45 AM ... and I was there.
Here is a brief list of some different things I have shared over the past week or so with others regarding my experience (in no particular order):
- Watching someone you love dearly suffer so greatly is literally sickening
- The last hour and a half before he passed away was (finally) peaceful
- I am thankful that I was there to help out
- I had very little sleep because I was either at Hospice, or driving Grandma around trying to take care of things for her afterwards ... but it was worth it
- I am still exhausted
- Aunt Tammy has had some set-backs from her double mastectomy due to all of the additional activity and stress
- I believe God will heal Aunt Tammy
- I have not had time to have a melt-down yet
- I am proud of big, strong Tommy and Critter for the way that they gently cared for Papa - the Hospice House staff said that they should have been paying our family
- I am so grateful that Papa is no longer suffering, but I am so broken-hearted - he was only 73
- I stand firm in believing that God is faithful
- I have beautiful moments savored in my mind and heart of standing by my Papa's bedside, singing hymns, reading scripture, and praying
- It was precious to hear person after person tell us how it was because of my Papa that they have come to know the Lord
- It was a service that celebrated his life on Earth and his Home-going to Heaven
- I need be reminded that God is holding my Grandma, my family, and me through this
Psalm 6
1 O Lord, don’t rebuke me in your anger or discipline me in your rage.
2 Have compassion on me, Lord, for I am weak. Heal me, Lord, for my bones are in agony.
3 I am sick at heart. How long, O Lord, until you restore me?
4 Return, O Lord, and rescue me. Save me because of your unfailing love.
5 For the dead do not remember you. Who can praise you from the grave?
6 I am worn out from sobbing. All night I flood my bed with weeping, drenching it with my tears.
7 My vision is blurred by grief; my eyes are worn out because of all my enemies.
8 Go away, all you who do evil, for the Lord has heard my weeping.
9 The Lord has heard my plea; the Lord will answer my prayer.
10 May all my enemies be disgraced and terrified. May they suddenly turn back in shame.
1 comment:
now on my 4th attempt to share with you "Yeah, Me Too"!!
You nailed it concerning "Papa's" last hours. I too was ok with being there, however, not believing this was happening. We were/are so very blessed with those that loved him too. How will we every thank them all! Some silly little thing will come along and catch you off guard {ie. Orange Cake Mix[gma]} that will help you to release. I pray that you will feel God hold on to you in that moment! love you much,mom
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